Eurovision ’14

The whining, complaining, and tantrum throwing has begun! What’s that mean? The Eurovision Song Contest is over!! xD For those of you who don’t know what that is, you can check out the Wikipedia page for full details but, basically, it’s like the Olympics of Singing Contests 😛 Since 1956, countries that are part of the EBU (mostly European) come together and each selects a song/artist to represent them until a winner is chosen. Participation is voluntary so the list of who’s in it changes every year, and artists can be selected by public vote or by internal selection. The host country is always the country that won the last time, so this year it was Denmark after Emmelie De Forest won in 2013 with Only Teardrops. But, sadly, don’t expect some grand bit of World Music or anything like that. While some countries stick to their traditional languages and cultures, many songs are pretty much nothing more than dance-pop in English. Doesn’t make them bad per se, but I know a lot of people would prefer it be a more traditional representation and celebration of culture rather than a “lets copy everything America/Britain is doing” thing.

Anyways, as you can imagine, this contest ALWAYS leads to major hissy fits by fans when their favorites or their home country doesn’t win, so it’s always best to watch from afar. Expect complaints about rigged voting in the same way you expect to keep breathing 😛 Yes, politics are very annoyingly brought into it, especially this year with Russia, but lets just enjoy the music ok? Speaking of this year, the tantrum throwing was turned up to 11 because Austria’s winning entry of Rise Like A Phoenix was performed by Conchita Wurst, the drag persona of Thomas Neuwirth. Sure, that might not seem so bad… until you actually see a picture of her. No, she’s not hideous, in fact she’s quite beautiful… except she’s a bearded drag persona. And, that my friends, is why people are so up in arms. Someone who “looked” either male or female would be fine enough, even with strong opposition as shown when Israeli’s Dana International won in 1998 with Diva after having a sex change five years earlier, but Heaven forbid something like this! Personally, all the complainers can just… ok, I’ll be “nice” since I believe you all know what I’m thinking (if you need a “nice” visual you can go here). Conchita’s song wasn’t my favorite this year, but it won both the people’s vote and the judge’s vote, so take that!


I thought about doing a simple poses for this picture, but then I started writing this post… Bitch, I’m fabulous! xD I’d also like to thank Miss αмαɭϮнєα Ɗuναι’ησя, creator of ~PixyStix~, again for her awesomeness when it comes to appliers. I owe my amazing body to her and her never-ending willingness to both jump on appliers and distribute them quickly. <3

Now, onto this year’s song list! Here are the links and some thoughts on all 37 entries of 2014, starting with the winner and my personal favs:

Austria’s Rise Like A Phoenix by Conchita Wurst – Not my favorite, but it’s still a pretty damn good song and video. It would be perfect for a Bond movie.

Slovenia’s Round And Round by Tinkara Kovač – This would be the winner of this year’s entries if I had picked. The song and video are both very beautiful and deep. I am completely at a lose as to how Loreen’s Euphoria can be called the best Eurovision song ever, but this is referred to as “25 years too late”. I think the fact that it only came in at 25 of 26 in the final is a disgrace. I will certainly be looking into this singer for more songs!

Russia’s Shine by the Tolmachevy Sisters – This was my second favorite song this year. It’s very bubblegum pop, but the lyrics are really good and it all came together quite well I think. People booed loudly every time these girls performed simple because they represented Russia, which is disgraceful, but I can understand the people who find it hypocritical that they are singing a song about “telling all the world to show some love” when their country quite openly doesn’t. Lets just remember to keep this about the music; don’t ruin it for these girls just so you can have a scapegoat to hate on Putin. Russia even finished in 7th place. We hate that we love you apparently.

Moldova’s Wild Soul by Cristina Scarlat – I think this is a great song and video, but for me, the singer’s voice didn’t quite sound like the right fit.

Estonia’s Amazing by Tanja – This is a pretty good song if you like dance music similar to Cascada. If I was creating something like a Top 10, rather than just picking my absolute favs, I would definitely include this one.

Latvia’s Cake To Bake by Aarzemnieki – This is such a quirky, silly, and fun song… which is exactly why it would never have won. This is a song you play around a campfire and just enjoy life too, as the video clearly shows. It’s like “Don’t Worry, Be Happy”, a great message and song, but unfortunately, not one that most people are going to pick when placed next to the others in this list. Personally, I love dancing around to it and just being silly 😀

Poland’s My Słowianie – We Are Slavic by Donatan & Cleo – Oh, the big upset. People were quite pissed when the judges gave this song very low marks even though the people voted it very high. It’s not hard to see why. One youtuber so gracious amended the lyrics to fit the video: “We are Slavic girls, we know how to be objectified and use sex to sell our music… shake what your mama gave ya”. Poland clearly took a page out of America’s playbook this year: sell sells, show us your tits. It’s a catchy song, to be sure, but not one I would want to represent my nation, especially not with that video attached to it (especially since the singer clearly isn’t following the “advice” of her own video about looking more “Slavic”). Some have tried to say, “it’s not meant to be taken seriously”… well, you’re right. It won’t be taken seriously, but not in the way you’re thinking.

France’s Moustache by Twin Twin – This song got a lot of crap too, but for the exact opposite reason as the one above. People thought it was a joke; it was called “very French” and “not something the rest of the world would like”… which I think is bull since it’s basically a dance song that would fit into any club’s playlist. People simply didn’t bother to pay attention to the lyrics. This song was actually meant to be satirical, but it came with a deeper message that everyone apparently decided to ignore, as shown when the song came in last. I quite like it.

Sweden’s Undo by Sanna Nielsen – It’s an alright song, but it seriously bugs me how she sings ‘undo’ until the music picks up in the middle of the song. The chorus being grammatically incorrect doesn’t help matters xP

Portugal’s Quero Ser Tua by Suzy – This seems straight out of a 90’s Eurovision xD Not bad, but not my thing.

Belgium’s Mother by Axel Hirsoux – Often in this song, his voice is a touch too high, he yells notes, and he mispronounces words so it’s hard to understand him. I’m sure it’s a great song, but it kind of hurts my ears 😛

Norway’s Silent Storm by Carl Espen – This is a beautiful song, but it’s also rather a downer.

Switzerland’s Hunter of Stars by Sebalter – This one made no sense to me.

Finland’s Something Better by Softengine – Pretty typical boy rock band song. What popped into my head though, is that the video made them look like how I imagine a young Neo-Nazi boy band would look like xD

Ukraine’s Tick-Tock by Maria Yaremchuk – The silly, jerky dancing was really distracting in this video, but the song is alright even if it is a bit mediocre to me.

The Netherlands’ Calm After The Storm by The Common Linnets – This is the “country” song of the collection. Pretty good if you like that style. They came in 2nd.

Albania’s One Night’s Anger by Hersi – This is a great song, but the fact that she sounds like Shakira is distracting lol

Malta’s Coming Home by Firelight – As on youtuber stated, “This sounds like a Mumford and Sons/Lady Antebellum collaboration”… pretty much. This song is dedicated to the 100 year anniversary of WW1 and all the soldiers who didn’t make it home.

Azerbaijan’s Start A Fire by Dilara Kazimova – A very classy, relaxing ballad to listen to with a glass of wine.

Armenia’s Not Alone by Aram MP3 – This song has a good message, but it’s pretty darn depressing if you’re not paying attention to it. Good music track though.

San Marino’s Maybe (Forse) by Valentina Monetta – Personally, all the maybe’s bugged me, especially how she sang them in the beginning. This seemed like an updated Wilson Phillips type thing to me hehe still good, I just wouldn’t add this particular song to my playlist. This song also seemed like it would be good in a Bond film.

Iceland’s No Prejudice by Pollapönk – This video was so cheesy it was hilarious. The song is similar to France’s accept the message was very straight forward.

Denmark’s Cliché Love Song by Basim – Bubblegum pop at it’s best, and the title is perfect. Simple, fun dance music.

Spain’s Dancing In The Rain by Ruth Lorenzo – Love song and go! The video is basically “Step Up! In the Rain” xD

Italy’s La Mia Città by Emma Marrone – I watched the English translation lyrical video for this, but it didn’t quite make sense to me… probably because it was a direct translation versus being fixed up to actually make sense in another language xD I couldn’t tell if she was talking about a person or a city, as the title would suggest… perhaps both. Either way, it’s a good song, and the video has some interesting visuals.

Belarus’ Cheesecake by Teo – This is such a cheesy boy band song (pun intended). At least, in the video, they look like their just having fun and not trying to be serious. I think if they’d tried to make this something serious, it would have been even worse xD

Greece’s Rise Up by Freaky Fortune feat. Risky Kidd – This is in the same vein as Zedd. If you like club music, you’ll like this.

Georgia’s Three Minutes To Earth by The Shin & Mariko – This song really caught my attention at first because it sounded like some Native American thing… I was quite confused xD It’s definitely an “earthy” song for people who like simple, “hippie” music.

Montenegro’s Moj Svijet by Sergej Ćetković – This song would not be out of place in, say, The Notebook.

Hungary’s Running by Kállay-Saunders – This song is basically an advert against child abuse, and a pretty good one.

Romania’s Miracle by Paula Seling & Ovi – Sorry, but there wasn’t really anything special about this song, save for the girl has a set of lungs on her :/

Ireland’s Heartbeat by Can-Linn (feat. Kasey Smith) – This is an ok song that could have been a great song had they just tweaked the lyrics a bit. As it stands, it’s pretty mediocre on all the fronts its trying to cover.

Israel’s Same Heart by Mei Finegold – While I like the idea of this song, I did not like this execution of it. I’ll just leave it at that.

Lithuania’s Attention by Vilija Matačiūnaitė – I have mixed feelings about this song, sometimes I think it’s a mediocre dance tune, but other times I think the singer does a good job with it (even though she often seems like she’s out of breath). Makes me wonder how much better she could have done with a different song.

United Kingdom’s Children Of The Universe by Molly – This reminded me of a young, modern Stevie Nicks.

F.Y.R. Macedonia’s To The Sky by Tijana Dapčević – Another mediocre club song.

Germany’s Is It Right by Elaiza – I know some people out there likes this, as evident by the youtube comments, but I certainly didn’t. It wasn’t even mediocre good… yet it wasn’t horribly bad either. For me though, it needs a lot of work before I’d call it good 😛

And, there you go! Here’s a playlist if you’d like to listen to them all 🙂 Enjoy.

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