A Month of Things: ME! Part 3

Here is “week 3″ of my “A Month of Things” Google+ posts.

Dec. 15th:
I’m behind on “A Month of Things” again but that’s ok, I have an excuse! I was having pictures taken 😛 Which is actually going to be topic #15: I hate pictures of myself. It’s not that I think I look hideous or something like that, but I just don’t find it natural. Our eyes didn’t evolve that way; we’re meant to look out at other things, not at ourselves. I don’t like mirrors very much for the same reason.

I’m not one of those people who checks how she looks 500 times a day. I care, obviously, but I don’t need to validate myself by looking in the mirror. How I look is not important to the people who matter to me therefore it’s not really excessively important to me either. So having to play around in photoshop with my own face is just wrong to me on so many levels xD

Everyone always bugs me about why they rarely get new photos of me even though I love taking pictures… because I don’t care what I look like, I wanna take pictures of other stuff! I want to explore the world, not my face 😛

Dec. 16th:
Along with a headshot I sent in for the anthology “Written in the Mitten”, I also had to write a little bio about myself… blarg, that’s my “A Month of Things” topic #16: I am a humble person so I’m not very good about prideful stuff. I’m a down to earth kind of girl that doesn’t like being the center of attention in any way so writing about myself in a “professional” manner is just really strange to me. It was even stranger since I wrote it in the third person haha 😛 It makes me feel boastful even if it’s not boasting.

Don’t get me wrong, I am very proud of my accomplishments, but I generally only feel comfortable talking about them when someone asks me specifically in a normal conversation. There was one moment in high school that I actually bragged about my accomplishments during that whole ‘first day of class introduce yourself’ stuff and I felt disgusted afterwards. I felt ashamed that I had acting like I was somehow superior when really what I had said wasn’t even all that noteworthy. I don’t know why I did it, but in some ways I’m glad I did because that feeling reminds me about how not to be. It tells me that I’m not that person, that I don’t need to boast to make myself seem more important to people who don’t matter in my life.

And yet, in today’s world, I list being humble as a weakness in job interviews because everything is about selling yourself and learning everything about someone from one quick “About Me” section. Companies don’t care about you unless you can list dozens of awards and such and such… I find it all rather disgusting. I wish people would actually go back to having real conversations again and actually take the time to get to know people rather than force them to come up with a 30 second schtick to “sell themselves” for friendship or a job or whatever.

I’m proud of my accomplishments, of what my life is, and that’s all that matters to me. And yes, I am aware that some may call me a hypocrite in saying this after I recently made a post about becoming published, but I feel there is nothing wrong with taking a little enjoyment in your accomplishments. Especially since I am not forcing anyone to read my posts; it’s not the same as standing in a crowd at a party and going “well you know, my work was recently accepted blah blah blah” 😛

Dec. 17th:
For “A Month of Things” topic #17 I am going to add more to a statement I made last time: I am really shy. Of course, if you talk to my friends they will totally disagree with me because everyone thinks I am the outgoing clown of the group, but I am actually pretty shy and reclusive. My mother used to hate it when I was younger, “go ask that sales person if they have any left” “nope, you ask him” xD

I am fine around people I know, very open and fun loving, but I have a lot of trouble getting up the nerve to talk with someone I don’t know for every reasons (most of which I know, some I don’t). And don’t even think about putting me in front of a crowd for a speech… oh I’ll do it, there will just be no movement but my lips and my eyes will never leave the page lol I hate people watching me! Even people I know, makes me feel all self-conscious.

I just never learned how to approach people with confidence because I grew up in a world where doing so was met with negatives. I am confident person, I just don’t/can’t open myself up to others until I really feel comfortable. So don’t feel bad if I don’t wander on over and strike up a conversation even if it looks like I really want too! How about you wander over here :3

Dec. 18th:
“A Month of Things” topic #18 goes along with the last one: Don’t put me on the spot! My brain works in specifics. I hate when people suddenly divert all attention to me without giving me some basis or warning to go off of. I loathe the “so tell me about yourself” questions. Ugh, ask me what my interests are, ask me what movies I like, ask me anything specific… just don’t ask me wide open general questions 😛

Obviously, any shy person is going to hate this, but my brain freezes in these situations so it makes me feel really stupid when everyone is starring at me and I’m not saying anything because I literally can’t think. I remember when I got my Bachelor’s and mom made me do the whole stage walk thing. Afterwards, everyone was like “we were cheering so loud blah blah”…. yeah, I remember being being completely deaf and having tunnel vision. Honestly, I don’t know how I made it down the steps and back to my seat!

Sure my brain does it’s best to snap out of it quickly but at that point people have already started to look at you funny xD So, if this occurs, give me a minute to collect my thoughts as they quite literally ran away!

Dec. 19th:
I am almost 2/3’s done with “A Month of Things” hurray! it’s an awesome feeling to know you’re being productive 🙂 Anyways, topic #19, coming off a post about my daemon, is about words. To be more specific, it’s about my love of words and their original meanings (I use slang but I don’t really like too). I also greatly enjoy learning the origins of various sayings, like today I read that “nothing to sneeze at” refers to a time when sneezing was the thing to do for aristocracy to indicate “you bore me” or “what you’re saying is not important” so telling someone something is nothing to sneeze at these days means it’s noteworthy.

While I like knowing that a ‘fag’ is a term for a cigarette, I like knowing even more that using it in that manner is still slang. Fag, in this case, is shortened from ‘fag end’ which is the very end of something (in this case, the butt of the cigarette). I’m not a word snob or a grammar Nazi or anything along those lines, I just prefer to stick with the original meanings and actually understand what I am writing. Far too many people these days say things completely incorrectly. ‘Literally’ instead of ‘figuratively’ is one that really annoys me. Rule of Thumb and Beg the Question are two great examples of misused sayings. People also, quite often, mispronounce words or sayings which is also very annoying. Like saying “nip it in the butt” instead of “nip it in the bud”, “I could care less” rather than “I couldn’t care less”, “wreck havoc” instead of “wreak havoc”, etc.

I encourage all writers to spend some time getting to know various words and phrases, to learn what they really mean and where they really come from.  For me, it’s up there with learning grammar and spelling.

Dec. 20th:
I don’t really feel up to doing much more than messing around in games today but I know that if I don’t do “A Month of Things” now then I will be like a week behind because of the coming holidays 😛 So for topic #20: I have a lot of dislikes (see ‘Dislikes’ above). Well, it sounds bad saying it that way, maybe saying that I actually put into words the dislikes that most people have would be better.

A long while ago, when I was first making a personal site for myself, I knew I would have to do a list of “dislikes.” I hated the idea of making a pitiful list with just a few things though so I decided to really make a list and expand on all things I disliked, found annoying, etc. After years of keeping it up, it still surprises me that people send me messages going “omg, you find that annoying too?” I find it interesting that many of the things on “my list” are things that are universal yet most people never think about them.

Dec. 21st:
I love animals in general but, when it comes to the universal debate, I will also choose cats over dogs. That’s the topic for “A Month of Things” #21: cats are awesome! And before anyone gets on my case, yes I have owned dogs as well as cats. I have experienced both sides of the fence 😛

I like cats independent nature, the fact that they don’t drool all over me xD, and that they take so much less work than dogs… among a bunch of other things. Don’t get me wrong, I really have nothing against dogs, I just find them too needy and sloopy sometimes. Besides, cats just fit so much better  in all those fun little nooks our bodies create. Don’t they Chris? (that’s Mabine laying with Chris earlier today in the picture below.)

Lots of dog lovers tell me that they don’t like cats because cats always seem so aloft and uncaring but I have certainly experienced the opposite. All the cats I have ever had have been very caring and compassionate, just the same as those dog lovers say their dogs are. One of my cats used to join me for walks around the neighborhood and I have never had a cat not come to me to offer comfort when I was upset. Loving cats vs dogs has nothing to do with their level of caring, it all depends on whether you want to clean your entire yard of just a litterbox 😉 hehe

This entry was posted in Ideology. Bookmark the permalink.

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *